Still Breathing

I felt like the air was multiplying, and I couldn't even think about what he said because I was so worried I wouldn't be able to keep up with the air. I tried to think of myself as a breathing machine. I told myself, you won't die from overbreathing, because you are a breathing machine, specially calibrated to adjust to the changing amounts of air in the room.

Can you believe it is October 1st?! I love new months. I think the first of every month should be a statutory holiday to celebrate and welcome in the new month.

It is getting colder, and sometimes I think that when I hold my breath I cannot feel. I convince myself that I'm not cold when its freezing outside, or I convince myself I'm not sad or anxious when something goes wrong.

Do you ever think of the worst possible thing that could happen in your life, and think that if it happened, you'd be so knocked off your feet that you'd forget how to breathe?

Maybe your worst fear has happened, and you already learned how to breathe again. Or maybe you're still holding your breath.

This morning I learned about a friend very close to my heart that went through breast cancer-- secretly. She let very few of her close loved ones in on her ordeal but mostly kept to herself and kept positive with treatments. Her tumors were benign and she went through the treatments and is now opening up about it, and I feel touched. She is an educator, in every aspect of life. She teaches others her theories in life, love, friendships, and careers, and now she is educating others on appreciating life, and not taking your health for granted. I'm so amazed because all this time, she has been so positive and happy and I had no idea what she was going through. I can't even imagine myself in a situation where your health is your biggest concern. To be honest, it was not one of my "forget how to breathe" moments, and perhaps I do take my health for granted, and perhaps I sweat the small stuff when I should just be happy and move on in life, considering the good things I have.

I'm going to try to stop holding my breath and just breathe through any obstacle life brings me.